Written January 26, 2019
My last few months have consisted of a series of architectural endeavours into the psyche. I have questioned the validity of a re-appointment of the levels in the hierarchy of needs, and whether a heuristic/creative dynamic is self-sustaining.The greatest challenge by far has been destroying the memory palace (more below) to remove any cognitive bias, as a means of re-building the entire internal model.
The problem with having a predominantly heuristic-based decision model is that heuristics tend to be oriented toward morality. This has been a constant problem for me; in an attempt to increase efficiency in my day-to-day life, I have grown an all-consuming system of heuristics that compromise actions too minute to even be considered for automation. In turn, efficiency has decreased, and turned into a wailing dynamic of strict adherence to pre-set rules. As an example, I reckoned it is productive to read three textbooks for a single course (two are "recommended" references in the syllabus), and actually fell behind as I slaved through readings. Instead of exercising a dynamic system that would push for efficiency, I adhered to pre-set heuristics.
Before the new decade began, I began to develop a new internal dialogue, a process which spanned several days. I read deeply "Meditations" by Marcus Aurelius, and began a study of "the Red Book" by Carl Jung. I created the foundation of what I will dub the Muscyroz Psyche.
The principle of Muscyroz is a detachment from subject and occupation, and a revelation in being. This means that one should not refer to him/herself as a student, doctor, sportsman, et cetera, but rather embody the skills of said subject/occupation, and distribute it within the personal palette of abilities. This lifts the burden of heuristics, as the person no longer operates under the norms of occupation, but rather his/her own architecture.
We build a Muscyroz psyche by destroying our current system. I warn you in advance that you should be careful in any attempt to re-configure your psyche. Consider the story of your empire.
To date, you, as a being, have stacked the bricks of your empire one-by-one, fortifying yourself from the sufferings that stem from the burden of being. You have dug moats to keep away the darkness, and allowed the doves to fly freely in your compound. You have built your version of a safety net; whether the mortar that keeps your walls steady stems from an ethical line of thought is not the question. I do not pose that your empire must be morally sound, but rather that every person has some sort of interpretation of the world around them, and the essence of this view is exactly what is captured within your empire.
While the doves of stability fly over the bright skies, you battle away darkness, disallowing it to reach within your grounds and infect your world. But our empires are built by one; we have only so much acumen in fortification. Sometimes, the tentacles of the kraken, the reach of darkness, find their way into your place of solitude. Pushed away from your safety, a state of panic ensues, and the heuristic bindings of the empire fall apart. At this point, everything falls into disarray, even if for a moment. We no longer stand on stable ground, but rather we have darkness staring at us directly. Efficient decisions halt, and we lose touch.
During those few days of thought before the new decade, I thought through this story. How can we keep a steady spine while staring directly at darkness, all the while being in a system we consider safe? I enacted forms of automated writing, and took Jung's instruction in communicating with the psyche. I thought and thought, and the answer slowly came out from under the veil. We welcome it. We welcome the darkness, and we understand it. How it affects us, it's strategies, and it's personality. We push away foolish heuristics and conformities, and instead rebuild a kingdom built not in the light of outside influences, but a completely independent interpretation of knowledge. Then, our darkness no longer stems from sources we are unfamiliar with, but rather from a completely internal place; we finally have all the tools to study it.
A person that practices Muscyroz does so by first achieving solitude. He or she destroys the empire they have built, and attempts to piece together the real pieces of his/herself. It is imperative that all attempt is made in only capturing the most genuine of traits; it is entirely possible that there are close to none, and this is okay. The resulting (or non-resulting) fabric of personality serves as the ground on which the new empire is built. Once all previous systems and heuristics are out the window, we begin the re-interpretation of our abilities. By treating knowledge as mortar rather that statues and sources of identity, the compass of our psyche no longer points outwards to occupation and external persona, but rather inwards, helping us navigate the world as close to objective as possible. This process will take time.
Once our empire is rebuilt through an internal architecture, we are ready to begin conversation with darkness. Let its sight peak through the gates, and stare back directly at it. Bask in it. Let it take control, just for a minute. Give your step to its instruction, and keep note of how it thinks. Do this throughout time, and you will build a blueprint of the kraken's character. This blueprint is all-encompassing, because the kraken is no longer swimming in the tide of the outside world, no, it incubates itself under the oceans that you have built yourself. The kraken lives within, and so you have all the facility needed to chart its actions. This method of evaluating your darkness is not a one-shot tale; constant revaluation is needed to ensure an engrossed understanding.
The last layer of Muscyroz is revelation. With a newly built empire stemming completely from within, you no longer need to adhere to heuristics. You no longer consider yourself by occupation or allegiance. You have re-adjusted the frame of being from involving complex social influences, to one that is centric on the world that you interpret individually. This is freedom. Suffering and darkness are pawns within your game, and you use your control of self to dance with them, whereas previously you used to run from them or push them away.
This is freedom.